What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How do I run away? I'm 15 and live in Oklahoma.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What are some difficulties in a JEE aspirant's life?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why do narcissists devour so much sugar (candy, ice cream, donuts, etc., in huge amounts at a time)?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

What's the point of gender reassignment surgery which doesn't change a person's chromosomes?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why did Trump’s team spin the lie that Melania Trump spoke several languages? Do they not realize she can hardly speak English after living in the US for over 40 years?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

How can we become the best humans? How can we trust each other?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

I caught my neighbor leaving his 12-year-old son home alone and he has not come back in 6 hours. Should I call CPS?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Is it okay for a wife who comes home from a date to tell her husband what she did?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

How do people who are deaf learn sign language? Is it typically taught by parents at a young age or are there programs available for learning it later in life?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

What is the difference between heaven and heavens?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!